Party of One


Ask any of my friends and they’ll tell you – when it comes to staying in, I’m the queen. If someone shows the slightest hesitation at going out for the night, I jump all over it like bees on pollen. “Of course you should stay in! Get some rest, watch some Netflix. Who would want to go out after the hellish week you’ve had?!”

Trust me, though, I love a good adventure. Lately, though, it seems like I haven’t had many. The last time I went out with a friend was in early December – we met up to explore Chinatown and have pho. Before that… I don’t even know! My weekends are filled with sleep, working my second job, laundry, and writing (if I can get motivated enough). What I’m missing is passion and trying new things.

I spent a majority of this week wracking my brain to figure out why I’ve become a total homebody shut in, but it wasn’t until this morning that I got my first major clue. A couple girlfriends and I were planning on attending this very cool Hollywood costume exhibit today, and for the last few days had been going back and forth on times. At 10AM, my phone rang. It was my friend, profusely apologizing that she and the others wouldn’t be able to make it, that they had just wrapped on a four day-long set and she woke up feeling absolutely lethargic. Could we re-schedule?

Immediately I agreed – I’d had those weeks where at the end, it’s all you can do to get out of bed and throw some food into your stomach, before climbing back under the sheets. Sets are mentally and physically exhausting, and I wasn’t about to throw a fit and demand she meet me to look at Dorothy’s dress from The Wizard of Oz.

We hung up the phone, and I sat there in my pajamas, mildly wondering What now?

Aha! And there in lies my problem. I’ve been relying too much on friends to do the activities I want to do. About a hundred times a day, I think about the day trips and hikes I want to pursue, followed up quickly by a mental checklist of who’d want to do them with me. Many times, I draw up short, because I haven’t got a friend who adores long hikes like I do, or someone that rock climbs. At that point, I abandon the idea and promise to think about it later, when I’ve got someone to do it with.

Now, I’m seeing a little more clearly that it’s okay to go off and do some of these things by myself. Not having a partner in crime shouldn’t dictate that I’m stuck at home all day, uselessly purusing the Internet. I just relocated my dog-eared guide to Los Angeles and Southern California, and am thinking about scheduling in some places I’ve been dying to see.

Additionally, I’ve got to make a greater commitment to making plans with my friends doing things we all like. My roommate got me a fondue set for Christmas, and I’m eager to put it to use.


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